How the worst moments in our lives make us who we are

tell me a story

How the worst moments in our lives make us who we are

TED Talk: Andrew Solomon

Post Created by Jennifer Kiley

Post Thursday 18th September 2014


Andrew Solomon: How the worst moments in our lives make us who we are – TED Talk

Published on May 21, 2014

Writer Andrew Solomon has spent his career telling stories of the hardships of others. Now he turns inward, bringing us into a childhood of struggle, while also spinning tales of the courageous people he’s met in the years since. In a moving, heartfelt and at times downright funny talk, Solomon gives a powerful call to action to forge meaning from our biggest struggles.

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Mitch Hedberg – A Comic Genius

lightness of being day wednesday negative
A Comic Genius

Comedian Mitch Hedberg

Post Created by Jennifer Kiley

Post Wednesday 17th September 2014


Mitch Hedberg - A Comic Genius

Mitch Hedberg – A Comic Genius

Mitchell Lee “Mitch” Hedberg (February 24, 1968 – March 29, 2005) was an American stand-up comedian known for his surreal humor and unconventional comedic delivery. His comedy typically featured short, sometimes one-line jokes mixed with absurd elements and non sequiturs.

Hedberg’s comedy and onstage persona gained him a cult following, with audience members sometimes shouting out the punchlines to his jokes before he could finish them.

With his rising fame in the entertainment industry, Hedberg appeared on Letterman nine plus times, signed a half-million dollar deal with Fox for a television sitcom, and was dubbed “the next Seinfeld” by Time Magazine. George Carlin and Lewis Black were reportedly among his comedian fans.

Hedberg was known to be a drug user, mentioning it in some of his jokes (e.g., “I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too”). In May 2003 he was arrested in Austin, Texas, for heroin possession.

On March 29, 2005, Hedberg was found dead in a hotel room in Livingston, New Jersey. He was 37 years old. Hedberg was born with a heart defect for which he received extensive treatment as a child. It was initially speculated that this condition may have played a part in his death. The New Jersey medical examiner’s office reported “multiple drug toxicity” in the form of cocaine and heroin as the official cause of death.

Hedberg’s death was formally announced on April 1, 2005, leading many to believe it was an April Fool’s joke, only to find out later that it was not.

Hedberg had an interview in the December 2001 issue of Penthouse. In the interview, published three years before his death, he was asked “If you could choose, how would you end your life?” His response: “First, I’d want to get famous, and then I’d overdose. If I overdosed at this stage in my career, I would be lucky if it made the back pages.”

A few months before his death, on October 12, 2004, Hedberg sat in on the news with Robin Quivers on The Howard Stern Show. He appeared on the show again on March 17, 2005, just 12 days before his death, and briefly discussed his drug use, saying, “Well, you know, I got the drugs under control now.” Stern responded, “Do you? You know how to take them responsibly?” Hedberg replied, “Yeah, you know, just for the creative side of it.”

[An edited down biography courtesy of Wikipedia]

I wanted to give a glimpse into who is Mitch Hedberg. I only just discovered him moments ago, before putting this piece together. He is funny. Intelligent & witty funny. He zings you then surprises you. I love his humor.

There are many videos available on YouTube. I will try to put together sections from his routines & post here on ‘the secret keeper’ if possible.

Hope you find the first hit of Mitch Hedberg delightful.

Dying at 37 is really f*cked up & from a drug overdose makes it even more f*cked up. I would love to hear what he would say about what is happening now. In the present of now as it moves through time.

Hope he’s hanging out with Bill Hicks & George Carlin & Lenny Bruce. So many to choose from but the three comedians I mentioned, I think Mitch Hedberg would fit into that group very smoothly.   <3  jennifer kiley

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The Many Phases of Daniel Radcliffe

the secret keeper:

Just a look into the past. A post from 2 years ago. I retrieved from hitting random posts & felt it would be fun for others to hear & see the gorgeous Daniel Radcliffe. We share a Birthday so I feel bonded to him. Want to celebrate his beauty & talent & genius. <3 jkm

Originally posted on the secret keeper:

The Many Phases of Daniel Radcliffe
Inside the Actors Studio Interview 1st & 4th Parts
An Array of Photographs
Some Only Slightly “R” Rated
Don’t Ask But I Have
That Photograph, Also
Not On Display Here

Daniel Radcliffe b. July 23, 1989-it’s my birthday too.

I felt so excited the first time I knew. I have such a crush on Daniel but only since he grew out of playing Harry Potter. He is in competition with Robert Pattinson. I may not be into men, being a lesbian, but there are certain men who just have an attraction inside and out to everyone male and female. This is a delightful interview. I do hope you take the time to enjoy the complete talk. I’ve listened to this several times since Daniel first was on Inside the Actors Studio. He just does great talk. Enjoy him in all his directness and honesty…

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Private Writings: Chapter #79 “In Our Hours of Darkness”

private writings a novel of true fantasy by jennifer kiley [shawn's 2d blue name]

“In Our Hours of Darkness”

Private Writings #79

Written by Jennifer Kiley

Post Tuesday 16th September 2014


Not Suitable For Children.


Anyone Resembling Anyone Living or Dead

Is Purely Coincidental.

1 alice-down-the-rabbithole [use best one]

Crypticistic Synopsis:

private writings to dr. annie haskell psychoanalyst

I am the storyteller using imagination fantasy feelings & thoughts

to discover self soul eternal serenity & bliss

but to most importantly tell the best tale ever after upon a time.

see you down the rabbit hole.

Private Writings: Chapter #79 “In Our Hours of Darkness”

Tuesday 10th March 2009

Dear Annie,

I am overcome with grief. Alison has finally opened her eyes and returned from her coma after that horrible crash. I cannot believe Sylvia never regained consciousness. Her brain swelling caused too much damage. She was driving. There never really was much hope for her. Her coma was always thought to be irreversible. She registered no brain activity from the start.

Catherine gave permission to release her organs. The crash has been under investigation for foul play since the beginning. Something caused the car to go out of control and for some reason it picked up speed and then stopped suddenly. Stopping short caused the car to flip over countless times.

Alison and Sylvia were literally crushed inside the car. It is a miracle Sylvia even made it to the hospital, her injuries were so severe. Alison’s life was always in the question zone. But after regaining consciousness, she told everyone that she was being questioned in a Way Station. If she didn’t answer correctly, she would never return from her coma. Alison felt she was not going to make it. She felt for sure that she was going to die.

Hearing Alison telling her story was devastating to me. Everyone close to Alison, especially Scottie were by her side the whole time. And her new fans were growing in number. They had been sending flowers and emails. Leaving candles, flowers & cards outside of the hospital. Scottie had her assistant send most of the flowers to other patients in the hospital in critical condition and to the children who were patients separated from their families.

I had been sitting vigil since Alison was admitted into the ICU. First at Redcliff & now at Cedar Sinai. Once I arrived at the hospital after being given a leave from Redcliff, I had the hospital set her up in a private suite for myself, Scottie & Jamie. When Alison woke up, we all intended to be the first face she looked into.

I know this feels like a rehash of everything but I need to write about it. That makes me feel like I’m doing something. And now that Alison is awake and talking, I just listen. She has a lot of bandages on her face and all over the place. I am afraid to see what has happened to her. She resembles the bride of Frankenstein. I’m trying to be humorous but it really isn’t funny.

Any way, I need you now. Please be there for me. I will see you in therapy once before I have to go back to Redcliff. I don’t look forward to the second but the first, I am very excited.

The police just showed up at the hospital. They have some news about the accident. It wasn’t an accident but somebody shot out a tire. They did it in such a way that it was very hard to detect. They feel someone was waiting in the grassy knoll just across from where the car was driving past. I know that sounds weird and too much like JFK but there you have it.

In all our last communications you said you had to tell me about something at our next session. That it was something serious. You have me worried. What is this all about? I hope you don’t say something neither one of us want to hear.

I have to go for now to be with Alison. So I will write more to you later.




© Madison Taylor 2009

“I think writing really helps you heal yourself. I think if you write long enough, you will be a healthy person. That is, if you write what you need to write, as opposed to what will make money, or what will make fame.“ — Alice Walker

Maksim - Somewhere In Time - Composer John Barry[Dedicated to Alison & Sylvia]

5 photo of white rose with red framed in blue

“A Dream
The beginning always starts out
With a dream.
It is all a dream
In our own nightmares”

— Madison Taylor

Le Chateau de Rocher - Home to Madison & Scottie   Their Cats & daughter Alison. She has her own place on the estate

Le Chateau de Rocher – Home to Madison & Scottie
Their Cats & daughter Alison. She also has her own place on the estate

play is not just play meryl streep“Pretending is not just play.
Pretending is imagined possibility”
— Meryl Streep

black_shamrock_ribbon green reverse

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Private Moments #79 “Raining Through the Pain”

private moments in paintings & poetry“Raining Through the Pain”
Private Moments #79
Poem Written by Jennifer Kiley
Post 15th September 2014

Poem for Private Writings: Chapter #79 - “In Our Hours of Darkness”

purple raining lady (c) jkm 2014

Purple Raining Lady (c) jkm 

“For that fine madness still he did retain,
Which rightly should possess a poet’s brain.”
~Michael Drayton~ (1563-1631)

hands reaching out into rain

“Raining Through the Pain”
Madison Taylor
10th March 2009

Raining through the pain
The strain of tears falling
The inside is outside
Crawling on the skin
Scraping the outer surface away

Raw is the screaming
The mind cannot control
When trying to reach out
Letting hands reach back in return
Feeling the pain surging through the veins

Losing someone is cruel
Living’s practical joke
No one is laughing
The creation of death
Should’ve been carefully considered

It is too late
It is in its place
Where it will stay
Until eternity turns around
And reverses its self

© jkm ’08

candle flame flickering gif

Rhapsody on a Theme of Paganini - Composer Rachmaninoff – Pianist Maksim Mrvica

garden waterfall private gazebo overgrown 4pmip&p

“Doorway to a Place of Enchantment”

“Creating is having the courage
to allow the seer into the private
moments of our imaginative lives.”

— Jkm the secret keeper
aka Jennifer Kiley McCormack

black_shamrock_ribbon green reverse

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“The Known and the Unknown” – #9

a writer's word polished or rawThe Known and the Unknown – #9
Excerpts from the Essay “Fail Safe”
Written by Debbie Millman
Post Sunday 14th September 2014

The Essay titled “Fail Safe”
Taken From Anthology
Look Both Ways: Illustrated Essays
on the Intersection of Life and Design

Debbie Millman is an Artist
Strategist & Interviewer

“Fail Safe” The Essay-Explores Existential Skills-Living With Uncertainty-Embracing The Unfamiliar-Allowing For Not Knowing-Cultivating What John Keats Famously Termed “Negative Capability”

psychedelic cat

The Known and the Unknown – #9

I recommend
the following
of action

for those
who are just
their careers


for those
like me,
who may be
midway through

heed the words
of Robert Frost

Start with
a big
fat Lump
in your throat

start with
a profound

a deep homesickness

or a crazy
Love Sickness

and run
with it.

If you
imagine less

less is
what you


don’t stop
you get
you Love.

as hard
as you can






20 years
from now

two weeks
from now.


blk & wht fluid abstract painting

“The Known and the Unknown” Part #9 - Jennifer Kiley


“Do What You LOVE

“Another Day”

creative musings [dragon]

“Another Day”

Sung by Roy Harper

Post Created by Jennifer Kiley

Post Saturday 13th September 2014


sad-heart moon stars & clouds in sky

“Another Day” - Roy Harper

“Another Day”

The kettle’s on,
the sun has gone
another day
She offers me Tibetan tea
on a flower tray

She’s at the door,
she wants to score
She dearly needs to say

I loved you a long time ago, you know
Where the wind’s own forget-me-nots blow
But I just couldn’t let myself go
not knowing what on earth there was to know.

But I wish that I had ’cause I’m feeling so sad
that I never had one of your children.

And across the room, inside a tomb
our chance is waxed and wanes
The night is young,
why are we so hung up
in each others chains?


I must take her,
I must make her
while the dove domains
and feel the juice run as she flies
run my wings under her sighs
as the flames of eternity rise
to lick us with the first born lash of dawn.

Oh really my dear
I can’t see what we fear
Sat here with ourselves in between us.

And at the door
we can’t say more
than just “another day”
and without a sound
I turn around
and I walk away.

glowing muted sun sky rounded edges

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