Trigger warning: Child abuse.
TO TRAIN UP A CHILD
A BOOK WHERE THE PUNISHMENT IS CHILD ABUSE
I am passing this message along to make people aware of this book and the petition to have Amazon band it from their shelves. DO NOT SELL THIS BOOK AMAZON. It perpetuates CHILD ABUSE.
This book makes me so angry to see!
Here are some quotes from the book…
“At four months she was too unknowing to be punished for disobedience. But for her own good, we attempted to train her not to climb the stairs by coordinating the voice command of “No” with little spats on the bare legs. The switch was a twelve-inch long, one-eighth-inch diameter sprig from a willow tree.”
That is a description of when they switched their 4 month old daughter (p.9)
This is a recommendation to spank a 3 year old until he is “totally broken.” (p.59)
“She then administers about ten slow, patient licks on his bare legs. He cries in pain. If he continues to show defiance by jerking around and defending himself, or by expressing anger, then she will wait a moment and again lecture him and again spank him. When it is obvious he is totally broken, she will hand him the rag and very calmly say, ‘Johnny, clean up your mess.’ He should very contritely wipe up the water.”
I found out about this book because of Xanga. PLEASE pass this around so this book can get removed by amazon! There’s a current Petition asking amazon to remove this book
A COMMENT FROM AMAZON
“All of the horrible abuse stories that have arisen lately are filled with parents who DID NOT LOVE their children AND DID NOT FOLLOW ANYTHING IN THIS BOOK. ”
That’s a lie.
According to recent news reports:
“Butte County District Attorney Mike Ramsey confirmed Thursday that other children in the home who have been interviewed told investigators “this philosophy was espoused by their parents.”
Please note the part that says “THE OTHER CHILDREN IN THE HOME”.
“Ramsey said he is also exploring a possible connection to a Web site that endorses “biblical discipline” using the same rubber or plastic tube alleged to have been used to whip the two young ridge girls by their adoptive parents.”
What rubber tubbing could DA Mike Ramsey be refering to?
I know this one:
“Later, a plumber’s supply line is a good spanking tool. You can get it at Wal-Mart or any hardware store. Ask for a plastic, ¼ inch, supply line. They come in different lengths and several colors; so you can have a designer rod to your own taste. They sell for less than $1.00.” Published on the No Greater Joy website run by Debi and Micheal Pearl.
“It’s simple controlled taps” See for yourself exactly how Mike does those “taps”.
(cHECK OUT THE ANDERSON COOPER VIDEO THAT IS AVAILABLE AFTER PLAYING THROUGH THIS FIRST ONE. MICHAEL PEARL IS DANGEROUD AND NO ONE SHOULD BE FOLLOWING HIS METHODS OF CHILD REARING.
“I have seen my 21 month old daughter love her life even more because I am helping her obey and not indulge herself. She is full of smiles, we play often together and she obeys all the time because that is how she has been trained. There is no such thing as the terrible two’s in our house because she has been trained from the beginning to not complain with her voice, not cry out in anger, and to comply always.”
A 21 month old child isn’t two years old yet. They are called the terrible two’s because the child is two years old when they hit them.
“If not for Michael Pearl’s book, my house would be filled with ongoing power struggles, frustrating days and most of all, an indulgent child who will have no self- control in her life when she is older” You don’t know what could have happened. You are just assuming.
“Our family has been very blessed by Michael Pearl and his example and tips for child-training and our marriage.”
When you mean tips are you referring to the passages on Page 46 or Page 47?
“Any spanking, to effectively reinforce instruction, must cause pain, but the most pain is on the surface of bare skin where the nerves are located. A surface sting will cause sufficient pain, with no injury or bruising. Select your instrument according to the child’s size. For the under one year old, a little, ten- to twelve-inch long, willowy branch (striped of any knots that might break the skin) about one-eighth inch diameter is sufficient. Sometimes alternatives have to be sought. A one-foot ruler, or its equivalent in a paddle, is a sufficient alternative. For the larger child, a belt or larger tree branch is effective.”
“Never reward delayed obedience by reversing the sentence. And, unless all else fails, don’t drag him to the place of cleansing. Part of his training is to come submissively. However, if you are just beginning to institute training on an already rebellious child, who runs from discipline and is too incoherent to listen, then use whatever force is necessary to bring him to bay. If you have to sit on him to spank him then do not hesitate. And hold him there until he is surrendered. Prove that you are bigger, tougher, more patiently enduring and are unmoved by his wailing. Defeat him totally. Accept no conditions for surrender. No compromise. You are to rule over him as a benevolent sovereign. Your word is final.”
A REVIEW FROM AMAZON:
This review is from: To Train Up A Child (Paperback)
Not only have I read this book but I was one of the “well-adjusted, pleasant children” subjected to the torture outlined in this book. Despite what parents who advocate the use of Pearl’s “training” WANT to believe about how well they’re children are turning out the result is much more devastating than the rosy pictures they paint in their mind. Sure you’re children MAY not complain as much, but they also won’t trust you as much. Sure you’re children will “respect” you if you consider fear to be equivalent to respect. Sure you’re children will seem like they are well-behaved because they WILL start to hide everything from you. If you want an open and loving relationship with your children, this book will NOT get you there. If you want a relationship were your children are afraid of you, distance themselves from you, and end up living a life of hurt and humiliation then go for it but no one will consider you a “fit” parent. This is NOT a Biblical representation of child-rearing. And due to the fact that multiple children have been killed by the practice of Pearl’s methods Amazon really should remove this book from their lineup. It isn’t about censorship of an “alternative” form of child-rearing, this is about not promoting or associating with a book that promotes…nay even demands, child abuse.
CLICK ON THIS LINK TO LOCATE THIS BOOK AND READ FOR YOURSELF AND DECIDE IF THIS BOOK SHOULD BE REMOVED BECAUSE IT PROMOTES CHILD ABUSE IN THE MOST BLATANT FORM POSSIBLE IN THE NAME OF BEATING YOUR CHILD TO GET THEM TO OBEY. WHO HAS THAT RIGHT? TO TRAIN UP A CHILD
QUOTATIONS on CHILD ABUSE:
“Many abused children cling to the hope that growing up will bring escape and freedom.
But the personality formed in the environment of coercive control is not well adapted to adult life. The survivor is left with fundamental problems in basic trust, autonomy, and initiative. She approaches the task of early adulthood――establishing independence and intimacy――burdened by major impairments in self-care, in cognition and in memory, in identity, and in the capacity to form stable relationships.
She is still a prisoner of her childhood; attempting to create a new life, she reencounters the trauma.”
― Judith Lewis Herman, Trauma and Recovery
“She still remembered sitting for hours as a little girl and pretending to be a hassock. A foot stool. Because if she could just stay very small, and very quiet, her mother would forget she was there, and then she wouldn’t scream about people and places and things that had gone wrong.” ― Eloisa James, An Affair Before Christmas
“the seriousness of emotional deprivation:
It is not difficult to understand how children who have suffered from malnutrition or starvation need food and plenty of care in their bodies are to recover so they can go on to lead normal lives. If, however, the starvation is severe enough, the damage will be permanent and they will suffer physical impairments for the rest of their lives. Likewise, children who are deprived of emotional nurturing require care and love if their sense of security and self-confidence is to be restored. However, if love is minimal and abuse high, the damage will be permanent and the children will suffer emotional impairments for the rest of their lives.” ― Mark Z. Danielewski
“If you say there is no such thing as morality in absolute terms, then child abuse is not evil, it just may not happen to be your thing.” ― Rebecca Manley Pippert
“When Benedict dies, he will have the pleasure of standing before whatever furious God he believes in, to answer for how it was that he knew for undeniable fact that one — if not dozens — of his priests repeatedly molested, abused and/or raped young children for decades, and he did nothing to stop it. How much does God believe the pope’s argument that Vatican PR trumps pedophilia? Joe Ratzinger, 82, will soon find out.” ― Mark Morford
“The fact is, the man who’d begotten me didn’t want me. In his eyes I should never have been born. And perhaps that would’ve been best. As it was, my existence had proven to be nothing more than a nuisance for everyone. I angered my father, brought strife upon my mother, irritated my teachers, and annoyed the other children who were forced to interact with me in school. All by simply being.
When you aren’t loved, you aren’t real. Life is cold, like the stone against my palm.” ― Richelle E. Goodrich, Dandelions: The Disappearance of Annabelle Fancher
“Not even Carol knows firsthand how it feels to be hurt in such a way by someone who’s supposed to protect you”
― Ellen Hopkins, Identical
“I Want to Shout
Leave me alone!
What’s wrong with you?
Don’t you remember who I am?
Who you are?
This is not a father’s love! I want to scream,
Can’t you see what
you are doing to me?
What you’ve done to me?
What you’ve made of me?
I want to cry out,
I am your little girl.
I am not your girlfriend.
I am not your whore.
I am not my fucking mother! But he is on top of me and my shout is silenced.
He is inside of me and my scream stays there too.
He is finished.
And I don’t cry out,
but I do cry a bucket of silent tears. He slithers
away and at last,
I quietly sob”
― Ellen Hopkins, Identical