Private Writings: Chapter #51 – Do Not Disturb
Written by Jennifer Kiley
Introduction & Chapter #1
Published on March 19th 2013
Published Early Tuesday AM
Posted On Tuesday 4th March 2014
WARNING: ADULT LANGUAGE AND CONTENT.
Not Suitable For Children.
All Characters Are Fictitious.
Anyone Resembling Anyone Living or Dead
Is Purely Coincidental.
private writings to dr. annie haskell
I am the storyteller
using imagination fantasy feelings & thoughts
to discover self soul eternal serenity & bliss
but to most importantly
tell the best tale ever after upon a time
see you down the rabbit hole.
namaste! madison taylor
Private Writings: Chapter #51 — Do Not Disturb
Tuesday 26th August 2008
When I got home from our session today, Scottie told me she had some news for me. Some good news and some bad. I told her to tell me the good news first. It had to do with our film “Whispering Spirits.” It’s been in production for two months. Today there was an injury on the set. Our new star to be, Ronan Slater, was in an accident during an action scene.
Her car lost control. It flipped over several times. Upfront Scottie told me she would be alright, just not capable of doing any acting that involves movement. Out of commission for no less than four months. That is speak for an indefinite length of time. Broke her right leg and arm in several places. Has a concussion. Some lacerations I heard were quite bloody. It would have made me faint if I were there. Thank the Goddess, worst didn’t happen. She’s very much alive. Needs some plastic work on her face.
Believe me, her accident was actually the good news. You wouldn’t think so. But when you hear the bad news you will understand why. For me, it really is worse. I’m bracing myself to tell you. Let me take a hit first. Okay. Here is where the nightmares begins. Mark the time and date. Scottie hired Sylvia Kendell to replace Ronan. Never any input asked for. Reason? Sylvia was available. Isn’t she always. An immediate decision had to be made.
Scottie wants to throw an impromptu cast party in our home this Friday night, to welcome S. Kendell to “Whispering Spirits.” I can’t mind the decision. Sylvia will be perfect in the role. I can’t disagree with Scottie. Her arguments are sound. It’s a good business move if we want “Whispering Spirits” to be made now, if it’s to have any chance of being a success. I did like Ronan. If she recovers and still wants to act, I’ll write her a role to almost die for.
I’ll finish writing this letter later. After the cast party, I’ll send it off in an email. You will see it before our next session. You can start planning our method of attack for therapy.
The party started out as an intimate dinner party. They often do. It ended up with our huge home overflowing with everyone in Hollywood that night. I was sorry you couldn’t make it. Who cares about the APA Code. Frack them. I never demand you play therapist at our functions. Just like the idea you are in my home with your family and everyone is having a great time.
Jamie Stansfield showed up. I was delighted and freaked out seeing her. What happened between us the last time we were together, I still haven’t been able to explain. I could have sworn we made love. But she said nothing happened. What she remembered was flashing sparks and zooming lights flying all around them. Jamie feels it was the mushrooms she consumed. Blames it all on hallucinations.
The way she described in detail what happened, it reminds me of the exact same way I envisioned my experience with Scottie in Paris. When we were on the bridge over the Seine. The lights were so romantic. We had just finished a meal of langoustine. It’s similar to lobster but smaller. It was cooked in a creamy garlic and butter sauce. We had garlic bread and a simple salad of mushrooms, cucumber, celery and tomatoes. I don’t like lettuce in my salad. It loses its crunch. I forgot to mention, we consumed a bottle of Champagne.
Before we left the restaurant, we went off to the powder room to freshen up. We took a few hits off a joint of fine marijuana laced with sprinklings of hash. It gave the room a golden glow. I felt lighter than air. When Scottie took my hand in hers, an electric charge shot up my air, straight into my skull. What a strange feeling. Now I know something happened. The same electric charge to my skull felt the same with Jamie. There is something specific about the charges.
On the way out, Scottie generously tipped the attendant. She smiled at us and exclaimed in a very pleased voice, “Merci, mademoiselles. Tres généreux. Puissiez-vous être visité par les féerie. Ils vous donneront une soirée divine et mystique.”
She handed us each a charm. Mine was St. Christopher. In college, he made me feel safe. My hero rescued me many times. The miracle rescues were mounting up. In cat lives, I was pushing my destiny to quickly.
After we were out of the restaurant, I asked Scottie what charm did she receive from the attendant. She opened her palm to reveal her charm. I stared at it. The charm was shocking to me, yet strikingly beautiful. The image of Isis, the Winged Egyptian Goddess of Wisdom. I recognized Isis immediately. Why? She holds great significance for me. When I understand what that means, I will explain it to you first. Right now, I am going to put that part out of my mind.
Scottie and I decided to take a walk. The restaurant was near the Seine. We walked for a short while until we were on a bridge that crossed over the river Seine. It was there we transcended time and space. We were surrounded by the energy I felt the other night with Jamie. Why would they both tell me, when I felt that I made love to them, that nothing happened. The experience was too grand to be an hallucination. How could this happen, first of all? And the fact that it did happen, supposedly, why the same hallucination with two different women? It doesn’t make any sense.
Someone is messing with the spirit forces that surround me. I may sound crazy but I have been sensing a darkness coming. It is getting closer. What it is or who it is, I have no idea yet. I do know that Sylvia was here tonight. My whole body went into a complete chill when I saw Sylvia approaching Scottie and me. We were near the glass wall near the back of our open room, for just such occasions. The expansive window overlooked our forest of trees, the gardens, wild and tame, filled with our grand selection of flowers and plants.
Back to the dinner party that turned into the event of the season. A way to end summer and usher in the Fall Film Releases for Oscar noms.
I was happy, even with all the insane changes. Until that night, later after the party, I felt an intensely heavy depression start pulling me into the darkness. As the control from the depression pushed down on my brain, Sylvia found me alone in my study. Why her?
She encouraged me to try a new type of MJ. It was a new hybrid strain called Nighttime Black. It was an Indica. She, also, had a Sativa strain with her. It had a strange name. Let me think. I remember. Bella Twilight. We smoked the Nighttime Black. After two hits, I cut myself off. My body was floating upward from the couch. But my body was still on the couch. We were completely disconnected. Seriously, I felt paralyzed. That’s when everything started going badly. What Sylvia did next was so wrong in so many illegal ways.
Sylvia locked my study door. She closed all the curtains. When she completed her task, she sat down as close to my still body on the settee. She began removing my cloths until I was naked. I felt angry but more frightened. My body was unable to do a thing to stop her. Even my voice was shut off.
The precise word to describe what Sylvia did to me is Rape. Her vulture hands pulled at my flesh inside and out. She forced herself on me. Her lips touched mine. She felt cold to me. My savior was too leave. Floating around the room, I watched emotionless. My depression was even dampened. All I felt emotionally was alienated. Where were my heroines? Scottie, Jamie, Alison, find me. Rescue me. Please hear me. I need you now in my study.
No one broke the door down. I was beginning to feel I was insane. This could not possibly be happening to me, now. I was lost in my thoughts, wishing for help, when Jamie came crashing through my study door. Carter McLeod to my rescue and her cat James. It was actually Patrick. He jumped on Sylvia’s back. Yowling and growling, with claws deeply entrenched in Sylvia’s back the whole time.
The police were called. They arrested Sylvia. Jamie held me until the police arrived. Scottie showed up a few minutes after she heard the sirens outside approaching our home. When she saw Jamie’s arms around me, she questioned us on what was going on. Scottie sat on the other side of me. Both Jamie and Scottie held me together.
I slipped out of bed to finish this letter to you. Jamie is staying with us tonight. Our bed is full with Alison on one side of Scottie and myself on the other side. Behind me is Jamie. Do you know how warm it is to be held by both my partner and the woman I am most attracted to in the whole world outside of Scottie? It was pure bliss, even though I know in the morning I have to give the police my full statement. I was too in shock to talk to them tonight. Our lawyer, Michael explained it was her Psychoanalyst orders that she rest and not speak until she was ready. I was never going to be ready.
The cops left. We all snuggled in bed together. I can’t bear the thought of having to recall what the evil bitch did to me. It’s too much to bear. My depression has returned and feeling more powerful against me. My thoughts are on killing myself. What she did was as awful as my abuse when I was a kid. Maybe worse, it was a woman. Being abused by a female is more unexpected, so it feels more brutal. It reminds me of ‘the shadow mother’ and her treatment.
I have to stop. I will write again if I need to. Otherwise, we can talk more in our next session. I am closing this letter here. It has all been too much. If I’m in any danger of doing anything, I will call you. I promise.
That’s all I can handle for now.
“Time for time and traveling with circuses must end. It is time to soar through the time barrier into all moments in the Universe.”
So, until I see you, I end with my favorite quote from the film Brief Sacrifice.
“Time can be folded and joined with all elements in all places as the one ultimate moment when time is all at once. In this place everything happens on a continual loop following into a continuum of time forever into infinity. In the “Silver Box,” there is contained the ability to draw time into itself and create the perfect infinite moment.”
I end this letter in “the moment between seconds.”
© madison taylor 2008
Somewhere In Time – Composer John Barry
The beginning always starts out
With a dream.
It is all a dream
In our own nightmares”
— Madison Taylor