We Miss You Sanji

In Memoriam: Sanji Gupta – The Maharajah

Once upon a time, I was up late at night and from outside the window I heard small meows. I followed the sound from the back of the house to the front. Went out onto the front porch and from around the corner edge of the house a wee long haired black kitten poked his head. He looked frightened. I reassured him he had arrived at a home of safety.

sanji1imagine

Baby Sanji <3

He approached the porch and jumped aboard. Once my hand touched him, he was won over to me and I to him. He rubbed against my leg and I continued to pet him. I told him to stay here and I would be right back.

sanji19

Sanji coming out after all clear from the storm <3

I went inside and woke Shawn to tell her there was a kitten in need of a home. Would it be alright to bring him in. She got out of bed, followed me to the front door, and we both joined the sweet kitten on the porch. Inviting him in, we fed him and groomed him. Shawn did the grooming and I supplied the endless amount of food his body needed to consume.

sanji6

Early on into Jesus slippers our Sweet Sanji <3

Back then my name was marge but I changed it to Jennifer. And the wee black kitten grew into the name of Sanji Gupta. He did fall asleep in Shawn’s arms and he claimed her as his human. She was his new mom and I was his other mom.

sanji13

Sanji taking on the Savage Beast <3

Since the summer of 1999 until July 1st 2015, Sanji Gupta, the Maharajah, lived a happy and secure life with lots of companions of various species. He even had special Lady friends he was very close to, especially Ellie and Gatsby.

sanji10

“Do I really have to pose,” Sanji asked <3

He held the honor of being surrogate father to Carter, Poe, and Parker, Gatsby’s baby kittens. She was a cast away we took in, unknown to us her pregnancy. We kept her children and today they miss their Pop.

sanji and carter as a baby

Sanji [The Maharajah] & baby Carter [the Prince] <3

We all miss Sanji. He was a very important figure in our family. Now he is flying high and has joined his brothers and sisters who came before and have all gone on ahead. Love you Sanji Gupta, your other Mom <3

sanji & ellie

Sanji & Ellie together again always <3

Private Moments: #85 “Horrors of Waiting”

private moments in paintings & poetryPrivate Moments #85
“Horrors of Waiting”
Poem Written by Jennifer Kiley

Post 27th October 2014
Poem for Private Writings
Chapter #85 “they hear nothing”
“Backing Off from Death
Painting by jkm

“For that fine madness still he did retain,
Which rightly should possess a poet’s brain.”
~Michael Drayton~ (1563-1631)

coming back to life by jk mccormack (c) jkm 2014

Backing Off from Death (c) jkm

hands reaching out into rain

“Horrors of Waiting”
By Madison Taylor
22nd April 2009

The horrors of waiting for death
It claims us in its own time
In the time between time
Torture wracks the body with tension
Shatters the nerves
Until all rattles apart.

soothing starts when letting go
Dying
Leaving the body behind
Setting the mind free
The soul will sail out
on wings like a bird of love
Finding peace after waiting
when time disappears
Release is found.

© jkm

candle flame flickering gif
Theme to Film: Somewhere in Time – John Barry


Rhapsody on a Theme of Paganini – Composer Rachmaninoff – Pianist Maksim

garden waterfall private gazebo overgrown 4pmip&p

“Doorway to a Place of Enchantment”

“Creating is having the courage
to allow the seer into the private
moments of our imaginative lives.”

— jkm the secret keeper
aka Jennifer Kiley McCormack

black_shamrock_ribbon green reverse

* * * * * * *

(c) jennifer kiley 2014

Why People Need Poetry

tell me a story

Why People Need Poetry

TED Talk: Stephen Burt

Post Created by Jennifer Kiley

Post Thursday 25th September 2014

 


Why People Need Poetry – TED Talk: Stephen Burt

Published on Jun 4, 2014

“We’re all going to die — and poems can help us live with that.” In a charming and funny talk, literary critic Stephen Burt takes us on a lyrical journey with some of his favorite poets, all the way down to a line break and back up to the human urge to imagine.

*       *       *       *       *       *       *

Private Moments #79 “Raining Through the Pain”

private moments in paintings & poetry“Raining Through the Pain”
Private Moments #79
Poem Written by Jennifer Kiley
Post 15th September 2014

Poem for Private Writings: Chapter #79 “In Our Hours of Darkness”

purple raining lady (c) jkm 2014

Purple Raining Lady (c) jkm 

“For that fine madness still he did retain,
Which rightly should possess a poet’s brain.”
~Michael Drayton~ (1563-1631)

hands reaching out into rain

“Raining Through the Pain”
Madison Taylor
10th March 2009

Raining through the pain
The strain of tears falling
The inside is outside
Crawling on the skin
Scraping the outer surface away

Raw is the screaming
The mind cannot control
When trying to reach out
Letting hands reach back in return
Feeling the pain surging through the veins

Losing someone is cruel
Living’s practical joke
No one is laughing
The creation of death
Should’ve been carefully considered

It is too late
It is in its place
Where it will stay
Until eternity turns around
And reverses its self

© jkm ’08

candle flame flickering gif
Theme to Film: Somewhere in Time – John Barry


Rhapsody on a Theme of Paganini – Composer Rachmaninoff – Pianist Maksim Mrvica

garden waterfall private gazebo overgrown 4pmip&p

“Doorway to a Place of Enchantment”

“Creating is having the courage
to allow the seer into the private
moments of our imaginative lives.”

— Jkm the secret keeper
aka Jennifer Kiley McCormack

black_shamrock_ribbon green reverse

* * * * * * *

Private Writings: Chapter #78 – “Be Gone Loneliness We’re Entering Paradise”

private writings a novel of true fantasy by jennifer kiley [shawn's 2d blue name]

“Be Gone Loneliness We’re Enter Paradise”
Private Writings #78
Written by Jennifer Kiley
Post Tuesday 9th September 2014

WARNING: ADULT LANGUAGE AND CONTENT
Not Suitable For Children.
ALL CHARACTERS ARE FICTITIOUS.
Anyone Resembling Anyone Living or Dead
Is Purely Coincidental.

1 alice-down-the-rabbithole [use best one]

Crypticistic Synopsis:

private writings to dr. annie haskell psychoanalyst

I am the storyteller using imagination fantasy feelings & thoughts

to discover self soul eternal serenity & bliss

but to most importantly tell the best tale ever after upon a time.

see you down the rabbit hole.

 Private Writings: Chapter #78 “Be Gone Loneliness We’re Entering Paradise”

Tuesday, 3rd March 2009

Dear Annie, I am writing down all that occurred at Sylvia’s memorial service. I will keep this letter devoted to what happened during all the activities before, during and after. The first thing is the opening are lines from a song. I will include the video from the song that was played at the services.

It is called “Take Me”…

“Take Me”

Take me away across the ocean
Out in the horizon the night is falling
Outside in the golden air
Washed out and no one’s there
She said I’ll need you there sometime
Sunset in the breeze
Drifting into me
Our love will make it right this time

So take me away across the ocean
Out in the horizon the night is falling
Take me away across the ocean
Out in the horizon the night is falling
Take me away across the ocean
Out in the horizon the night is falling

Skyline closing in
Her eyes whispering
Please swim across the night to find
Underwater lights
Shadows in disguise
Your lips come close to mine in time
Sunset in the breeze
Drifting into me
Our love will make it right this time

So take me away across the ocean
Out in the horizon the night is falling
Take me away across the ocean
Out in the horizon the night is falling

Written and sung by a singer from the future, I believe. Name is Rufus. Don’t try to understand. It is too complicated to explain. Actually, one of my ghosts gave me the song to use. She liked it. It is amazing.

The Lyrics I used in Eulogy were read by the Sandra B., a close friend of Sylvia’s & was there for her when Sylvia allowed any one to help her.

Different people had comments. I am going to list them as I remember. The memorial service was televised so a great many people were able to say their goodbyes. Sylvia Kendall may have been very confused with the world and didn’t want to be here any longer but she was very loved across the world by many many many fans. In this I just include what I remember from different people who actually knew her and some people who just felt she wanted to say something and some who wanted to say Sylvia was going to be missed greatly.

Michele W said: “Sylvia was always there to listen to me. She heard and listened to my problems as I tried to listen to her. I didn’t realize she was in so much pain. We always say they’ll be there for someone after they’re gone. Why aren’t we there when they need us instead of reading about their death after they’re gone and always saying I could have saved her. No one can save somebody when they are determined to kill themselves. I only wish we could know in advance so we can save them. In a split second when we are not looking that is when they disappear.”

Julia R says: “I love her and I will miss my friend forever. She was a good friend which makes me feel like I was a bad one. But it isn’t about me now it’s about Sylvia. Rest now Sweet One. You Will and Are Already Missed.”

Robert P says: “I never had a chance to work with her but I use to see her at parties and I enjoyed talking to her. She was the rescuer of most parties. She will be missed.”

Bob D says: “We once were lovers, she was the best I will always love her.”

Angel J says: “I am angry with Sylvia and yet I love her soul. She was someone who I could love forever. I will love Sylvia – Forever.”

Meryl R says: “She was a brilliant actress. She was nominated for an Oscar. She should have won. I will miss all she would have done on the big screen and those wild parties. I wish I knew her better, been there to listen. I wish I could have known what was going on inside her. No one really knows anything about what is going on inside of someone else. If we did we would try to save everybody and no one can do that. Goodbye Sylvia.I will miss you and the work we could have done together and maybe the friendship we could have made.”

Next is the poem I wrote for the eulogy and read at the funeral or actually the Memorial.

“Entering into Paradise”
Eulogy Poem

Entering into the inner realm
Searching out the emotion of love
The connection drawing on the power
Existing past life and beyond death

Waiting wanting to return
Meets a familiar expression
Eyes hiding underneath a veil
Time stops until it returns renewed

Finding our soul mate once was tricky
The path followed needed
The map of fate for guidance
To awaken the senses in their foundation

High above the sky soaring
Through the clouds and beyond
The spirit waits to be as she is
With the secrets of the Beyond

The sacred place where death visits briefly
And exits quickly after arrival
This is presented to us now
Our fate in our new creation
Is set in place for us now

The last thing I am going to include in my letter to you Annie is what Catherine spoke at the service. She had every one in tears.

“Thank you everyone for coming today and for those who sent emails. My daughter Sylvia is watching now and sees just how much everyone loved her. She had a very good life but it was a difficult one. Her father died when she was very young. We all know he had AIDS. We had been separated from the time she was little. It was hard on Sylvia meeting death at such a young age. We missed him but she missed him more. She never was the same after her father’s death. She saw him vanishing before her eyes.

I tried to give her as much love as I was able. She needed to feel loved by everyone. Being on the screen and on the stage she was given this love by strangers. Sometimes strangers make the best lovers and give the best love. They don’t have a past with us. So sometimes it’s easier to love someone you don’t know then it is to love someone you think you know.

I love my daughter and I will always love her. I miss you sweetheart.

My heart is broken. She should never have died so young. I feel I should have been able to do more. But I loved her so much I don’t feel I denied her anything, especially my love for her.

Her spirit is free now. She can find happiness. She is with her father now.

Please pray that my friends Madison Taylor and Scottie Andrews’ daughter Alison Porter comes out of her coma soon and makes a full recovery. I cannot believe my daughter would do such a horrible thing by trying to take Alison with her. I can’t believe she took her own life either.”

Catherine begins to cry silently, tears running down her cheeks. I went to her and placed my arm over her shoulder and walked her back to her seat. I sat down next to her and held her as she cried silently.

I forgive Sylvia, Annie. I only feel pain that she should not be gone. That Catherine is so crushed. I should end the letter now. I am feeling like my soul is so hurt inside the pain feels almost impossible to bear.

Love,

Madison

@>-;–

© Madison Taylor 2008

“I think writing really helps you heal yourself. I think if you write long enough, you will be a healthy person. That is, if you write what you need to write, as opposed to what will make money, or what will make fame.“ — Alice Walker


Maksim – Somewhere In Time – Composer John Barry[Dedicated to Annie]

5 photo of white rose with red framed in blue

“A Dream
The beginning always starts out
With a dream.
It is all a dream
In our own nightmares”
— Madison Taylor

Le Chateau de Rocher - Home to Madison & Scottie   Their Cats & daughter Alison. She has her own place on the estate

Le Chateau de Rocher – Home to Madison & Scottie
Their Cats & daughter Alison. She also has her own place on the estate

play is not just play meryl streep“Pretending is not just play.
Pretending is imagined possibility”
— Meryl Streep

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